Bill thinks this website is crazy. He tried replacing his picture from Freshman year with a newer, sexier one from Junior year, but the internet just wouldn't have it. Fortunately, this means y'all just have to come to our concert this fall to check him out! Bill is extremely full of himself and likes to tell everyone about how good he looks. So it really sucks that he's too awkward and shy to be truly self-aggrandizing. In lieu of bold-faced lies about his shockingly beautiful personality, he would like to insert here a few true facts about himself:

1. Bill is a Senior in the College of Arts and Sciences.
2. Bill studies Government, but tells any normal person not from Cornell that it's Political Science.
3. Bill lives at 103 Sage Place. This will probably be the location of a party you attend very soon.
4. Bill falls instantly in love with anyone who cooks him food, especially mashed potatoes or steak.
5. Bill often quarrels with a large stuffed bear belonging to Benjamin Rosenfield. If you see this bear, run.
6. Bill is now 21. He still drinks like a 10-year-old.
7. Bill is from the greatest nation in the world: New Jersey.
8. Fact number 7 has no bearing on Bill's love for up-state New York, NYC, and Boston. Bill only dislikes Connecticut because it makes his drive to Boston and Cape Cod devilishly long.
9. Bill doesn't normally refer to himself in the 3rd person.